my short story

Posted by silent on April 18, 2008

Your Story

I am a college student, 18 years :D

I was an addictive MMO player 4 years ago. A lot of good things came out of the game, a lot of bad things came out the game. This was Final Fantasy XI Online.

I first got it, accidentally, didn't think i'd win it so cheap on ebay lol. Didn't know it was monthly subscription too. But didn't want to waste my money. So i hooked up, I played a little bit now and again and I really liked it, I was a huge FF fan and this was my first time, being 14 it was kinda cool also since I didnt have any friends really where i lived. (move around a lot).

I met a friend on there, who I got close with, we did loads together, he was like a brother. I even went to see him (they paid :O), 10 hour coach ride. (uk). We got on so well, he even came to live with me for over a year when he got a job near me. Was some fun times. That was a good side, well. It's not so good now, he went home then a few month later, got an xbox 360, n gave his pc away and hasn't spoken to me since :( lol. But oh well, i know what hes like so i let it be.

I also met a girl on there, we were very close friends, that was all it was ment to be, spoke on phone a lot, she was in US and i was in Uk lol. After a few month we decided to try go out since at the time i had a bit of faith and she always seemed like the type of women who would let me fly over (i earn a lot for a kid, im a web developer so i could afford it) but i thought i'd not chance it so soon. I kept asking now n again for a picture of her, but she wouldnt, if she did it was be VERY close up face one, this went on for almost 2 years. We were on n off, i still yet to get a picture of her that isn't just a closeup face lol, i dont know why, i told her i dont care what she looks like, but it still carried on.

I got a lot of good experience and bad experience out of this, i hate the game now, honestly I took it for advantage, Since 4 years of gameplay got me just about everything in game and stuff people would think to never get, my account was worth about $1200 (sell to us people) so i sold it. That was the only way i thought to myself of getting off. I could of deleted it, but i didn't wanna feel like i wasted my time.

I stopped trusting this girl completely, i got kinda to be an asshole towards her, i didnt care about her anymore cuse i'd got nothing back over the whole 2years, not just a dumb pic but anything, i felt nothing from her for a very long time, i kept telling her im moving on cuse theres people out there who would put their time aside for me.

Over the 2 years, we always fought, we was EXTREMELY destructive. Very simple things would set us off into a fight, but if we wasn't fighting, you'd think we were perfect. We were both very hypocritical to each other, i never understand why when we both knew we were and we both said we were, but we kept on doing it. Like it planted a seed in us and wasn't leaving. Came natural.

As I spent just about every minute on the PC, since im the type of guy who loves to get every minute out of their day, i spent a lot of time educating myself. I am now pretty much education addict, if theres new 3D software or Photoshop, i'll be in there learning every single thing about it, reading web languages everything. Since FF wasn't full screen and I had 2 monitors, I could multi task. I kept doing a lot and learning a lot, but at a very low pace compared to not playing the game. Now in my College, so far all assignments i've pretty much handed in the next day, while others still stuck after 3-4 months. Just need my way into Uni, so i took the easiest thing i could to get my 3 distinctions.

Last Year on my 17th birthday, the girl promised me she'd go on cam (i bought her a bloody expensive one so it'd make her look good lol) and she never did, i was ruined n felt like shit then, i had a complete "£$% birthday. So this year I said to myself, if you can't make a change on my 18th, im gone, no words said. (told ya i became an ass lol). And she didnt, so that is when i sold the account.

I am pretty happy I made the choice, I built up such an emotional blocking wall over the year, i didnt give any thought, i just sold, uninstalled FF binned the discs, got myself a ps3 out the money :D.

This helped me a lot in real life, strangle. Previously i'd always be to shy to do anything, i'd be to shy to walk up to a girl or something, but now i've just got a bit careless that i don't think too much into things (im a very extended thinker), so i just "do it" rather than "what if i did it". I been able to get to know some new girls and stuff, some good some bad, thats just life ey :P

So overally it was a very mixed situation, i miss the game in the a way of I love the "Game" itself but I purely hate the "community". I went on a friends account 2 weeks ago, and my ex still plays, im shocked, but i knew she would, she is endulged in that game, i know her to well now and she still trys to lie. I just said im off and uninstalled game again lol (originally asked to level my friend but i couldn't be bothered) to be honest i just wanted to see if i really -had- the power to leave and not get gripped in, i knew i had won over the game and im free from it.

Now i am way to busy to play MMOs, personally I just see them a waste of time, getting to no where, even $1200 is not enought for 4 years work! hah. I now am learning to make map games, and i'll be sure not to get a job with a MMO team! lol.

Thank you if you read, but thats my story :O i'd love to of been interviewed for the film :( i'd be able to put that story in a lot more depth and context, dont know if it'd be interesting for anybody but i didn't see any teenagers in the film, so it'd be a change :D

Re: my short story

Submitted by Peter Brauer on April 18, 2008.

Crazy story. The truth is it is not very unusual. But thanks for sharing it with us.

My question is, do you regret it all? I mean looking back, wasn't it better to have someone important in your life even if it didn't work out. I fought with my high school girl friend all the time, but I don't regret it at all even though we really hurt each other in the end.

BTW. I think this movie is finished, so I don't think anyone else is getting interviewed.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 19, 2008.

The only thing I regret, (maybe not as powerful as regret) is that it all happened on FF online. I'm a huge FF fan you see, so having a huge bad experience on 1 of the series makes me a bit sad XD as a gamer. But they announced they making another :) wont play as much though.

I don't regret it, overall she was a big part of my life even if i never touched her. I still wish her well, and 1 of my reasons for leaving was because I thought it'd be a lot better for her to find someone close. I was becoming a careless ass to her, and we were both way to destructive and hypocritical I knew it was right. I tried to be friends but she couldn't. I understand that though so i let her have her ways.

:) ty for reading.

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 19, 2008.

Intense story. I honestly thought it was going to end with you finally meeting this mysterious person from FF online, but I guess all stories don't have a happy ending. Too bad, eh? Sometimes it's better, though. You're now over the addiction, and focusing on more important matters that can take you somewhere. I have to say, video games, of any kind, as well as MMO's, are great to play. It's just you have to be careful of not getting too addicted that you don't do anything better. I'm a World of Warcraft kind of girl, and even though I love it, I find it too boring to get addicted.

Good story, none-the-less.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 19, 2008.

thank you =)

PS. I don't know why i called my thread "short story" lol

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 20, 2008.

Haha. Good point.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 20, 2008.

Also I forgot to add in my last post.

A old friend of mine still spoke to this girl and we was talking recently and I found out she had lost her Final Fantasy account (stolen!) so I logged on xfire to see if she was on, tell her sorry to hear ya know lol, cuse it sucks and I wouldnt want that to happen to her (Was a bloody good account like 3k worth).

We started talking and stuff and we're pretty good friends now. We have a rule that we NEVER talk about our current love life at all, we do if we got nothing going on, no hurt in that, but if one of us finds someone or we do something, it doesn't cross conversation. So that is neat.

I did finally get to see a picture of her, full not just up close... but i didn't keep it for long for my own safety....Sadly I still don't believe its her, it probably is but since I've had almost all the time knowing her as just a nothingness or a blurry picture or something I had to create myself, it's come to the point where if a picture of her doesn't look how I predicted it would, then I just feel nothing.

Good and bad though, doesn't make me bring up old feelings and I can still think nothing. Which for my safety is good lol. We do talk on phone again also, since we both know each other well, what makes us laugh and know if we call each other a silly name we're only joking. Kind of glad it turned out that way.

I am also glad she isn't camera shy no more.

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 22, 2008.

I remember when I was like 13, I use to go on Habbo Hotel and talk to people. Once this person claimed to "fall in love" with me. It was nuts and I thought it was a crazy idea. Then later on I was like... I think I like him! Just because someone claimed to like me, without even knowing how I looked like or who I really was. I asked for his picture, but he didn't want to give it to me. There was another relationship based completly on a lie. It was them, being someone else. They gave me pictures, I heard their voice. But it wasn't them at all... it was all stupid. So, it took a lot to even trust people again online. I hated it. So now, I just speak casually to people, unless I've seen them on webcam, know their friends, etc, etc.

So I wouldn't be suprised if she isn't who she says she is. I mean, it could be her, but she simply isn't giving you a REAL picture of herself. It could be her friend or someone she has found online. Which is sad...

But, at least you two talk. Have set out rules. Things like that can't hurt. Just need to be careful. Lol.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 22, 2008.

Yeah I know exactly what you mean..... she still doing suspicious things... and it's weird. But I try to think like; No point in wasting my time to figure it out.

I saw her on msn for a tiny moment, then she sent me a pic and the 2 people looked TOTALLY different, one looked like a model the other had different colour hair, less of a tan and glasses and totally different facial. Was weird, but since i put myself to see them no longer than a few seconds as i dont want the image in ma head i can't really say much. When she sent me the pic, she said she "scribled" out her sister, couldn't see face at all.... i dont know why she would do that, i think it's her but shes pretending to be this person next to her.

I've been so busy lately with other people/work/college and other games =D lol that the right mind to think about her is to think nothing at all.

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 23, 2008.

Yeah, sounds fishy, but you're doing the right thing.

Any interesting games you been playing?

I don't have anything of school or a job to worry about. Just relaxing. That's the life! Haha.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 23, 2008.

Currently playing Mass Effect on Xbox, waiting for Lost Odyssey then MGS4 =D woot.

I have very little college, 3days a week, and my work is all home and I can do it extremely fast. So I have so much free time too lol. You got a console or just PC? What games you play?

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 24, 2008.

Well, you don't have that much waiting to do for Lost Odyssey. It comes out at the end of the month! How exciting. I love stuff like that. I'm currently experiencing that but for books, movies, and a theme park. ^^

I have a PC. Plus consoles. XBOX 360, Nintendo Wii, Playstation 2, Playstation 3.
I have to admit, the only thing that is mine is my PC. The consoles are all owned by my boyfriend.

I do play World of Warcraft now and again. I'm not a full time gamer or anything. I've played The Orange Box games. Halo 3, Burnout Paradise, TETRIS. XD I guess I've had a taste of everything. Uncharted: Drake's Fortune. I mean, the list goes on.

The only thing that I've really have loved has been Nancy Drew Games. Their mystery games. It's so lame! XD I haven't played 'em in a while. WoW also has my heart too.

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 24, 2008.

Hah wow, more consoles than me, I don't have wii XD but I hate the motion sensor stuff, especially six axis lol.

Playing burnout paradice now :D it's soo good.

Im so excited about Lost Odyssey, I love it, the fact it's made by former Squaresoft members is just a dream to me lol

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 24, 2008.

Hmm. Lost Odyssey didn't really catch my attention. I like Ratchet & Clank, Jak and Daxter. Those sort of platformy games. SPYRO. XD

Yeah Burnout has good graphics. Scary that they're just going to keep getting better in the future with the rest of the games.

For Harry Potter, on Wii, I heard it's fun because you can use the Wiimote as a wand. :D

Re: my short story

Submitted by silent on April 24, 2008.

LOL that sounds kind of exciting, except i'd look a bit silly.

I love Ratchet & Clank, I got it with my PS3, I've finished it several times though, might be time for it's Ebay age lol

It is scary about the graphics these days, few more consoles and graphics becomes like reality, that is when I'll stop buying resident evil and silent hill lol.

Re: my short story

Submitted by ForeverDistance on April 27, 2008.

Ahh! But, I love Harry Potter. Well... not obsessed with it. I never get obsessed with stuff that it SHOWS. BUT, I am waiting for the new Harry Potter Theme Park to open in Orlando, Florida. ^^

I don't like playing scary games, let alone watch scary movies. o.o Ohhhh no. Lol. Can't handle it. When I played Half-Life 2, I was SO scared. XD

We have surround sound and a huge TV, so anytime we're watching a movie/show/playing game, I ALWAYS get scared because I think someone's behind me. I'm a chicken.

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